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What if your nephew was like, “I’m not sure I’m even gonna vote. These people are both bad” on election day. But then the day after the election he wrote a blog on deadspin about how we’re all fucked because Trump won? What should I say to this specific type of shithead nephew?

Jesus Electoral Christ, Jill Stein Actually Raised Over $2 Million To Fund a Vote Recount 

This wild-ass year will never cease until it gives every one of us a heart attack, a seeping ulcer, and a probably false sense of hope: Jill Fucking Stein—presidential Green Party candidate and diverter of 1.2 million perfectly good votes—is on track to raise $2.5 million to request a recount of ballots in three swing…

This story makes no sense for so many different reasons, but for the record, I’m totally cool with peeing nearly anywhere. I personally pee in my bathroom’s second sink. Every time. Wake up in the middle of the night with a boner: pee in the sink. Easier to aim, obviously. Wake up in the middle of the night without a…

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