I am poking my head in to say hello! How are you folks? Where is the handy kinja tutorial? I tried the gawker faqs, but they failed at explaining pretty much everything I want to know. Do we have Betty White gifs? WHAT DID I MISS?

(everything, I think it's been since the baby was born. I didn't want to put my Internet friends through the torture that is early infancy. Coherency is a pipe dream for a fair few months.)

ETA: during my absence, I have spent uncountable hours reading FoxNation. I apologize for any additional insanity, but I had to figure out why health care is anti American.