1. Write a headline that contains an inflammatory but rhetorical question or statement. Like:

Should You Have Sex With Someone You Hate?

(Real examples here.)

2. Get Jim Cooke or another Gawker Media illustrator much more talented than you to make an illustration like:

3. Write about 1,00o words that amount to "On the one hand wordswordswordswords. On the other hand wordswordswords. Cliché conclusion."

4. Hit publish.

5. Get 945 comments.