So I'm not much of a jewelry person, but I used to have this plain silver ring that I liked a lot (my students were endlessly curious about its meaning, but the fact is that I picked it up at a Renaissance festival a hundred years ago). It's been missing for a while now, and I'm ready to call it a loss.

I figured, well, why not just buy another one? There are plenty of places to buy them online, but would it kill one Internet retailer to call it something other than a wedding ring? I don't want a wedding ring. I just want a plain silver ring for my own purposes. Calling it a wedding ring is not just inaccurate; it makes me not want to buy the damn thing because it would feel vaguely pathetic to do so.