I don’t much care about Pete, but it would be so much quicker to say he isn’t Bernie.

This was Build-a-Bear for middling Democrats, not the transformative candidate that could take the White House and spend four years battling a hostile Senate!

I, too, saw Ocasio-Cortez on TV and her platitudes.

So when my editor and chaos agent Katie McDonough asked me to spend a week reading everything I could about Buttigieg


Why? As if I needed another reason to not trust anyone who goes by “Katie.”

...and would also like to think my opinions are based on more than deeply felt yet possibly misguided emotions.


Don’t worry, they are 100% based on misguided emotions.

The first thing that made me go, Oh fuck, I kind of like Pete, was an interview he did with NowThis, in which he shares that he doesn’t think a hot dog is a sandwich!


There is a whole slew of other pieces here, all of which are how I imagine a typical Jezzie picks a candidate.

If you’re someone who, say, wants the planet to be habitable and for people to not have to crowdfund their cancer treatments, once you get past the likable, telegenic exterior and actually listen to what he says—well, the charm fades when you notice he’s polling in the top five of all the candidates.


How are you connecting these ideas?

What I realized during my week of PeteWatch is that his extreme likability is exactly the reason I don’t like him a a presidential candidate. It feels like a trick, and kind of is. Because Buttigieg—a candidate seemingly dreamed up by some Democratic National Committee algorithm, who seems to believe that values trump policy


Values trump policy is like the fucking Get Out motto. Their patron saints, Bernie and AOC, are the embodiment of values trump policy.