Have you ever wanted to be a doctor without all the work of actually becoming one? National Eye Exam Month is your chance to act like a medical professional even though you're not one!

Feel free to pry apart the eyelids of your friends, family, coworkers, neighbors, and random people on the street. Test if they can read your Thomas the Tank Engine slash fiction from ten paces away. Shine high powered flashlights into those peepers and squeeze special fluids into them (ideally, fluids you have collected from your own body, because that shows you care). Simply tell your victims patients it's National Eye Exam Month and they won't mind at all.