Hey all! I know since the move I’ve been popping in and out, (and because Gawker is filing for bankruptcy) so here’s a very special edition of RedWriter’s life (also, I know in terms of relationships, I’m an infant compared to the rest of you so if I say something that you makes you go “no shit, sherlock” KEEP YOUR OPINIONS TO YOURSELF. I AM LEARNING LIFE!)
I LOVE IT OUT HERE. The cost of living is on the same level as the midwest and I’m slowing getting caught up on my debit.
I’m working at the best store with the best crew out of all the many, many, many stores I’ve transferred to. It’s the most diverse staff I’ve ever worked with and everyone gets along with just about everyone. The money is great too. Canadians are my new favorite people because DAMN do they know how to tip and they are so pleasant! They’re all gone now but I look forward to seeing them again next season.
Surprisingly, getting the cats back together turned into WW3, 4 and 5. It had only been three months since they had lived together whenever I moved in but they acted liked they had never seen each other in their life. We got woken up in the middle of the night many times before they stopped acting like bitches.
Things are going well with the boyfriend, but there was an adjustment period for me (he’s lived with girlfriends and a wife before. My longest live-in relationship has been with my cats.) Pretty much every concern/issue/trivial matter that we have is new to me and dealing with it is a trail and error experience. In no particular order, here’s my relationship realness:
1) When we first started dating ManWriter did not like cats, didn’t like to be around them, and his face would blow up if one was nearby. Now they have taken over his place.
2) Felix has technically been living with my boyfriend longer than I have and MW said if we ever break up, he’s keeping him. I have to admit, I thought that was hilarious (and I’d do it. Felix and MW are bros.) MW wanted to know why cats come into the bathroom when you’re on the pot. Because they do.
3) By the way, the cats have more furniture in the house than we do, complete with staggered wall shelves that go around the apartment.
4) I had unfaltering suspicion ManWriter was not washing the bed sheets as much as he used to let on and I was right (“oh I have two of the same fitted sheet” my ass.) After washing every sheet, pillowcase, bed sham and comforter, he said the bed never smelt so good.
5) Speaking of the bed, I love pillows, especially body pillows. I have, like, four body pillows and six regular pillows. ManWriter asked did I really need ten pillows on the bed. I replied “Yes, in the same way you need three tvs in our studio apartment.”
(the above comic actually was something that happened but the argument was over the Xbox.)
6) I’ve said it before but communication is everything. We were doing the distance thing for majority of our relationship so we developed great communication and that translated over well with living together. It definitely hasn’t been all butterflies and unicorns; after having some serious stress of being understaffed and overworked, MW started lashing out at me a bit. The first couple of times I let it drop because he was running on fumes. However, the third time it happened I read him for filth and (calmly, I swear) told him to fucking stop it unless he was cool with pushing me away. It turned into a really great conversation because he said he hears himself sounding like a bitch and it’s not him at all so he would work on dealing with his stress better. When one of us is feeling slighted, we’re really good about saying “Yo, your tone is mad confrontational right now. What’s up with you?” and discussing it.
7) Do you guys know how gorgeous the scenery is out here? We are surrounded by mountains from all sides, which is great for when the zombie apocalypse happens, and there’s no tall buildings so we have a beautiful view of everything at all times. We took the tram back in February and there was a blizzard at the top of the mountain. It was awesome to be in a foot of snow and then 20 minutes later, back in the desert.
8) Some weird science things have happened though and maybe our resident science person can explain: my sense of smell has seriously decreased since I moved here. No idea why. My insomnia, which has always been a bit frustrating but somewhat controllable, got even worse when I moved here. I couldn’t sleep at all. Finally, I got a prescription for edibles and got it back to control.
9) I really love the natural rhythm we’ve fallen into; at night we get the bed ready, fill up all the air purifiers and humidifier, then put on an episode of Star Trek: The Next Generation. We’re almost done with series and I’m a bit sad about it.
10) MW has seen me my natural state: wigless. He’s the only man I’ve ever dated who has. He even helped me take out my twists. For those of you who don’t understand; to a black woman, this is the equivalent of him proposing.
I love the desert. I love the scenery, I love that I don’t have to take three highways to get to work, I love that I can go two weeks before I need to fill my car up, I love that I wake up and have coffee while viewing the mountains, and I love being able to see MW everyday. We do a lot together and we both feel like we’re in a real relationship now. It was supposed to be for a year but MW is now the only teacher at his school so it looks like we’ll be here for about two years, possibly more. This is absolutely ok with me; I qualified for a student loan forgiveness program (THANKS OBAMA!!!) and with the money I’m making and saving living together, I should be almost debit free by the time we leave here.