Either I'm being FB stalked by a bi-sexual 29 year old mega fitty, with a penchant for sex and is none to shy to let people know. Or by someone else who isn't every straight guys wet dream and has a profile pick straight from a Google image search. (this pic)

It started a few months back with a friend request; nope don't know you, haven't got any mutual friends and your probably some sort of virus. After the initial friend request denied I got another then another and message, "want to be friends big lad/boy?" or something very very similar.

Then another request only now 'she's' friends with two people I know. I'd forgotten all about it until this morning. Mrs Wing posted a pick of me and a female friend on Sunday, it must have come up on 'Emma's' feed via the mutual friend. Now she's left a comment saying "cute couple" about me and my bud.

Mad as cat piss.

The rest of this pic which appears on her fb page and is cropped as this for her profile picture, has the shuttershock logo emblazoned across it.