Well, I survived.
I survived the Lyft ride to LGA with driver who was basically a female MAGA Kanye West.
I survived the 2 and a half hour delay at the airport.
I survived staying at a VRBO property that had no hot water for the first 2 days and whose definition of a swimming pool was:
Most importantly I survived a half marathon with minimal training (not advisable). It took me 3 hours 38 mins and 43 seconds—slow AF. But I wasn’t last and even though my legs were cramping up 500ft from the finish line, I ran across so it looked like I had run the whole way—like a true champion.