"But wait," you're saying. "I don't give a crap."
To that I say, "Thanks a lot for being so encouraging, you jerk."
Anyway, jerk, thanks for the advice on how to handle the inevitable relocation question from employers—it came up when one company e-mailed me from Florida, asking if I had any ties to the area. That one I couldn't really dance around, so I had to essentially say, "I have none, but it seems like a nice place." Oddly enough, that didn't disqualify me, and I'm interviewing with them soon.
The other job—sort of a dream job—is in Boston, and they just contacted me to set up a phone conversation. I may or may not have done a happy dance when I got that e-mail, and I may or may not have had to fight the urge to respond within thirty seconds, which probably would have looked weird.