Last night my father wanted to share an inspirational picture with us from my mother's Facebook account. He decided to use Skype, because a few years ago my mother had used Skype once to talk to the grandkids. This is what we heard over Skype:


"Hello? Is this on? Hello? Hello?"

"Honey, come over here and see if you know how to make this work."

"They're not saying anything yet. No, I just see a picture of me."

"No, I don't want to call one of the kids to come over and show me how. I can do this. Christ..."

"Did that work? The goddamn thing doesn't work."

"Paste it? How, with the mouse?"

"OK, Keyboard then. Control then V. Got it."

clickclick-clickclick-clickclick-clickclickclickclickclickclick

"It's not working. How do you do it with the mouse?"

"I AM right clicking. It just brings up a box."

"Where the hell did that come from? Why is there a picture of a goddamn salad?"

"How do I make that go away? I'm not sending a goddamn salad."

clickclickclickclickclickclickclickclickclickclickclickclickclickclickclickclick

"Well, we'd be better off if I did break it. I hate this goddamn thing."

"Son-of-a-bitch!!!"

"I don't care who can hear me."

"Because I'm just going to turn the whole goddamn thing off. To hell with it."

"I don't do that Facebook. You have one."


Then there was silence. We never did find out what the picture was.

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