Strange story here.

Yesterday, I received a visit from child protective services. Apparently, a report had been filed claiming my five year-old was seen wandering around our neighborhood by herself, and that she had been seen naked in our yard, and been witnessed attempting to get into a stranger's car.

Well. Imagine my surprise! The first allegation is rooted in something that happened on Sunday; I let her go to her friends house, our neighbor, about a 45 second walk away. While I normally walk her over there, she wanted to go by herself, and as it's so close, I didn't see the harm in it. I told her to come home if her friend wasn't there. I watched her walk across the street. She didn't come back. After approximately half an hour had passed I decided to check on her. She wasn't there-her friend had gone to the fair. I checked at another friends house. Again, not there. On to the next house, no ones home, no kid, and panic starts to set in. I grab the other kid, put her in the car and rush over to the park that is maybe a quarter of a mile away, thinking that somehow shed decided it would be a good idea to go there by herself.

She's there, with her friend and his mom. I admonish her, tell her that she needs to be where we've agreed or I'm not going to let her play woth her friends in the neighborhood anymore.

So that's the "wandering around by herself" bit. She has no idea what I'm talking about when I ask her about the strangers car. She has DEFINITELY been naked in the yard. She's a kid, and she does weird things like that. She's not been taught how utterly shameful our bodies are. But, you know, it's not like we LET her do it. We make her put clothes on, on the one or two times she's done it because her clothes are wet or it's hot outside and she wants to play in the water but doesn't want to come inside for a swimsuit or whatever.

So , this social worker shows up and I let her in and she interviews me and goes to the girls' schools and interviews them and now I'm reading up online about this shit and discovering that unless the worker has a warrant, I shouldn't have talked to her at all.


At first I was just pissed that a neighbor would do this without speaking to me first, especially if someone ACTUALLY SAW HER TRYING TO GET INTO A CAR WITH A STRANGER. And, what parent hasn't had a kid wander off? Is the state telling me that it's illegal for me to allow my nearly six year old child to play in another child's yard without my presence? If so, my parents would have been arrested every single day my entire childhood.

I mean, there are HORROR stories out there concerning false reports to CPS. Happy fucking Halloween indeed.