I had no idea your fair city is where bachelorette parties and gangs of housewives go when Vegas is deemed to be too expensive. I had my heterosexuality questioned by a soccer mom because I did not want to do a body shot off of her.

Your beer is lacking, but you make some very well done cocktails.

Your east side though, is spectacular, like a Southern version of Portlandia. Great bars, cafés, and bookstores.

The roller derby made for a great date night, right until that poor girl suffered a compound fracture above her left ankle. That was my wife's first viewing of one of those live, so that brought the night to a screeching halt.

It was a good thing the gun show was next door at the fairgrounds, so the ambulance was there and ready.


You are a better time than New Orleans, but not as fun as Seattle. But I still want to know - what is with Jack White and his dislike of bananas?